Friday, November 5, 2010


What does one say after being gone so long? Or is there anything that needs to be said at all?
I've thought of you often over the last few months- those twos and threes that used to stop by often. Those tens who stumble by by accident. I've come to the page with all intention of posting....but the fire was not there- not even an ember.

Blame it on a mid-life crisis of sorts. The months leading up to retirement were hectic. Excitement of new beginnings became anxiety and doubt. A man defines himself by his work and thus sentences himself to a hellish sort of non-being when the work is done.

Blame it on medication. Since I returned from Iraq sleeping has been a challenge. Its always been a challenge but made more so since I returned. Conversely, staying awake during the day has also become a challenge. So a sleep study and diagnosis of narcolepsy and a few handy dandy drugs- some to go to sleep and some to stay awake and things are great. Till I start taking them regular. And it turns out that one or both tend to conjure dark clouds.

Blame it on a spiritual malaise. For many months I have dealt with my own time in the desert. A time of silence from God. Never in doubt wherein lay my salvation and my strength but far from the warmth and assurance. No doubt that this was much my own doing in many ways.

But blame takes space and time that should better be used to apologize to friends for the silence and missed e-mails and absent responses. And so we begin again.


Delirious said...

Not sure if it will help, but a friend of mine found reflexology to help with her insomnia. Not sure if it will help narcolepsy, but maybe you could at least get rid of one of the problems! :) She was living in China at the time, and at first the reflexologist massaged only her feet (using accupressure). Her insomnia went away. But then the reflexologist moved up to her calf and worked there. She said it was so painful she had to stop treatments. And then her insomnia returned. Bleh....
Glad you are back! I missed your wit. I actually was just thinking about you the other day wondering how you were doing.

Delirious said...

Oh, and my condolensces that our SF Giant team beat the rangers for the world series. I kind of had all my bases covered because having grown up in Texas I could claim their victory for my side, but living in the SF area, I could root for their win too. :P

FEAR the BEARD! ;)

eutychus said...

Thanks D-
I may try that at some point. Right now, its not so bad since I'm retired and can nap when I want.:-)
Going back to school in January. We'll see if things are different then.
I was disappointed that the Rangers didn't put up a bigger fight but it was still a proud season. I think you'll see them again real soon. The Giants did a great job.
I';m really not a baseball fan but that guy with the beard is just plain weird....

Delirious said...

Ahh..but you see that was the whole point! Distract them with the beard and they won't be able to play! I myself found the beards mesmerizing, although ugly. lol

Kindred Spirit said...

It's very nice to see you back, Eutychus.

eutychus said...

Thank-you, Iris.:-)